well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Quick, to the slutcave!
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize