Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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