he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
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I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
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My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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