So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
