Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
