we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
