it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
