That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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