I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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