cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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