is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Randomize
