sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
