your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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