this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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