Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
All the doctor said was why
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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