If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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