...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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