yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
