took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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