It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize