So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
