think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
There's always time for handjobs
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
