I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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