it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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