I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
