Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
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