don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
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It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
So here I am, sexting at work.
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