Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
someone threw a dead crab at me
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
