Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
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