he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
