8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
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As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
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I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
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