Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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