my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize