I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize