I'm drive I can fine osifer
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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