Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Spring semester is just not the same w/o you

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  (313): Spring semester is just not the same w/o you http://tfl.nu/5znn
  Replies (7) Good night (797) Bad night (1053)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.

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  (443): God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse. http://tfl.nu/g7w2
  Replies (18) Good night (4073) Bad night (1020)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.

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  (610): I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again. http://tfl.nu/bt9u
  Replies (35) Good night (3291) Bad night (1342)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...

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  (330): So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers... http://tfl.nu/y9ah
  Replies (8) Good night (2409) Bad night (1162)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"

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  (317): Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call" http://tfl.nu/v8oa
  Replies (28) Good night (4958) Bad night (1107)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else

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  (785): Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else http://tfl.nu/imin
  Replies (8) Good night (2724) Bad night (1138)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  what is it with giant penises always finding me

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  (216): what is it with giant penises always finding me http://tfl.nu/ji8j
  Replies (26) Good night (4254) Bad night (979)
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  (714): View more from California

  He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.

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  (714): He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up. http://tfl.nu/ay8q
  Replies (11) Good night (2605) Bad night (707)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse

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  (216): Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse http://tfl.nu/es8j
  Replies (3) Good night (1353) Bad night (609)
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  (916): View more from California

  You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.

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  (916): You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito. http://tfl.nu/1uk0
  Replies (8) Good night (2172) Bad night (615)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...

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  (847): I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest... http://tfl.nu/j6s5
  Replies (6) Good night (2552) Bad night (773)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.

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  (815): E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou. http://tfl.nu/m8k9
  Replies (10) Good night (1237) Bad night (864)
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  (714): View more from California

  She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.

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  (714): She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar. http://tfl.nu/8m40
  Replies (4) Good night (1683) Bad night (652)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.

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  (501): I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it. http://tfl.nu/ipd9
  Replies (5) Good night (1217) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.

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  (919): I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water. http://tfl.nu/3pkl
  Replies (1) Good night (817) Bad night (402)

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