She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....