I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize