just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
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