Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
