I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
The Olympian is in my bed
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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