I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize