Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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