Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
My vagina is very pro this idea
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