your room smells of hookers.
And success
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize