I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
