Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
My balls are so social today.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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