Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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