Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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