So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
4 words: hood of his car
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
we should paint friendship bongs
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
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