Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
FUCK WHALES
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize